It's a Rangoli

There's this Tamil Paati (at least in my imagination) who does these beautiful Rangolis by 7 am everyday. One of the highlights of my morning walk (note, not jog but not stroll either) is waiting to find out what piece of art she has created today. It is weird to walk by looking over-casual, use darting looks to make sure no one from the house is actually outside and inconspicuously click a pic . Everyday. But they look so awesome don't they  !

One day though, I saw a youngish lady outside (heart shattering sounds of "she's not a patti" were heard) and I walked up and said, hey I like the rangolis you put everyday, they are beautiful and she laughed and said "no, that's not me, that's owner aunty from upstairs" . So, it still might be a Tamil Paati no ?

Flashes of inspired thinking..

During a discussion yesterday, while talking about someone who got real rich in a short time, someone said, "now he's successful" and I had a one of my "How didn't I realise I was this smart before" moments. 
I wondered why it was that being rich is considered being better than any other goals that humans tend to have, I realised that it's probably because it's a quantifiable quality. You can't measure how happy a person is , or how much good one has done, but you can definitely measure all the things one owns! Even kings were feared or respected based on the sizes of the kingdoms they conquered. 
Hence, the need to live in the tallest building, own the fastest car and what not. In the movie 3 Idiots, isn't that what the Class Topper tries to show off - amazing house and car, pretty wife - all quantifiable. Of course, we are shown finally that he depends on the hero for it finally, but I digress. 

While I am writing about the nuggets of wisdom that I have come up with, here's another recent one. I travelled down a stretch of road and back one afternoon, onwards in a mad hurry and on the way back like I was spending a lazy vacation day on a beachside hammock. While going, I just needed to get ahead, I took some risks zigzagging, bounced in and out of all available potholes, had flashes of road rage, I couldn't believe people were ambling about so aimlessly (and more importantly, blocking my road because they weren't pushing their limits to make way for themselves) While coming back, I was in the Fuel Economy Zone Speed, noticing new hoardings, no honking and was enjoying the ride. Standby for Wisdom Transmission.
Isn't that how we live life? We decide how fast we go, where to stop, what risks we can take, when to stop and smell the roses. We see others and are quick to judge their decisions while we do whatever catches our fancy. Well, I guess what I realised was, when we have a goal, we do more to make it happen and there is fun in making things happen but stress too because we are stepping out of the comfort zone.When we don't have that sense of purpose, things still happen, we still finish the journey probably more relaxed but we don't use all the abilities we have. Well, that's just me thinking, a journey and how living life is almost the same!

There must be so many more amazing thoughts floating around in the spaces of my mind. I'm off on a hunter-gatherer mission to find them all.

Being Inspired by the Idiot box.

And no, I'm not writing this one about the likes of NatGeo, Discovery , you've been warned !
There are always interesting characters around us, seeing them on tv(though fake) gives us time to see so many nuances in the personality that we don't get to see in real life.
For quite some time, I liked House. Of course, I've always liked characters who are super smart, but this guy goes from being Mr. Little to House MD and of course his characters in all those British comedies.
The latest tv show that I have been regularly watching is The Good Wife. It's almost exactly like any other lawyer show but I like the leading lady. She has some amazing conflicts- working as intern competing with a fresher working tirelessly,dealing with all sorts of weirdos. She likes being a good person and doing the right thing even when she crosses the line many a times to win her cases or to survive in her world. An instance is when the firm introduces peer reviews and a partner asks her opinion about it and she says "It gives everyone a chance to say something bad about the other" and he says "I read your reviews, you haven't". I sort of liked that scene. It shows the audience that there is a chance to be different, if only you want to :)
Well, this post has certainly been a ramble, not what I set out to write .. but hmm ...

The joys of a flashback...

After a loooooooong time, I saw a movie where I could 'joll' over the hero. For anyone who isn't familiar with the term , it means 'to drool over'. I'm all for acting skills are important, the looks just have to suit the role and all that ... but when it comes to a good looking guy making goo goo eyes at his onscreen love interest, ahem .
You know how when you are young, you know exactly the definition of good looking. There is a list of items to check off and there is no room for compromising (everything has to be a 10 , a rare 9 is just that, a rarity) Typical, Tall , Fair , Handsome, Great Eyes, Great Smile ... One of my favourite tests to judge if a guy was good looking was "If I pass by him on the road, will I turn around to look a 2nd time?". I remember being very particular about what I thought good looking was supposed to be. And I guess I used to see enough guys fit the bill , total NSP (Nayan Sukh Praapti) . I love stumbling on old abbreviations. NSP was the term we used to describe just looking at people. (Pleasing to the eye - that would be the closest meaning in English to NSP, but NSP sounds so much better)
Then somewhere down the line, (read along with growing older) , the definition changes. You realise looks are not important, that most people have only partial 'good looking'attributes . And most importantly, you begin to find people attractive for who they are more than how they look. And slowly, you change. You see only the good in everyone, for example - my doctor is this bald man with glasses and he's shorter than me but everytime I see him smile at a patient or see the way he holds babies and coos while patiently fixing all their problems  - All I can see is that he has a beautiful smile and that makes him good looking to me !  ( Teenage me would be shuddering now)

For most of my life, when I attend weddings with my mom and invariably we talk about the physical appearance of the groom and bride . My mom would say things like "He looks nice", "You can't expect guys to look better than that" for people I would rate 5 or 6 on 10. And of course all the aunties around would agree. And I would always think , what is it with old people and low standards in the looks ;) Now I realise that maybe the older generation was looking at the sort of person the groom is, or his social standing or his accomplishments and that colors their perception of his looks. And I get that. Now. Damn , have I gotten THAT old already ?

 But after seeing the movie, like a jolt I remembered all my teenage ideal guy criteria. It has been so long since I've looked at someone and gone "Haiiiii" (other than my hubby of course!! I go Haiiiiii alllllllll the time :) ) I kept looking at the scenes and songs and kept going "My God, he is one good looking guy" quite loudly into hubby's ear much to his annoyance. Well, I did see the movie and listen to the dialogs and all that but mostly it was nice to just look at a good looking guy . Here's to NSP !
Oh and I'm talking about Sidharth Malhotra in the movie Hasee Toh Phasee. 

Healthy Chapathis, anyone?

How was today. Didn't study half as much as I should have.
My yoga instructor didn't let me do Surya Namaskar and says I can't do any for at least 10 days. Grrrrrrr.
I found a local "Wheat Flour Grinder" who is famous in the area. And my mom gave me a list of pulses/food grains that can be added to make really healthy chapathis - other than the wheat itself of course.
I learnt the English names of all those items:
Jowar: Sorghum/Milo.
Bajra : Millet.
Alasandalu : Black Eyed Peas.
Senegapappu : Bengal Gram Dal.
Raagulu : Finger Millet.
And Soya!
Mix all these into wheat get it grinded/powdered at the mill. And voila , you have amazingly healthy chapathis.

Turns out even stuff like Horlicks has wheat and stuff. I so did not know that.

Here's to learning things you don't know about ! And here's to healthy eating :)

How To Become a Housewife!

In just a few simple steps: -

1) Finally accept the fact that your job isn't letting you be all the you can be.  Deliberate for a few months. Talk about finances, future, health - and even if there are doubts and you know you want to try to make a new life for yourself. Quit. Put in your papers, finish all the KTs, enjoy the cubicle camaraderie, take a last look and let go !

2) Find out what you actually like doing and go for it. Nothing to stop you now.

3) Recollect all the things you ever heard or knew about housewives and you will see that they are all true. You will find you have more time to cook, try out lots of recipes, heck even pack a lunch box for hubby !
You will want to make sure your house looks spic and span.
You see yourself wasting away in front of the tv if you are not careful.
Whatever you do, DO NOT sit at home all day, it will drive you stark raving mad . 4 walls , Internet and TV and an active mind suddenly left free are a terrible combination.

4)  Make sure your hubby is one AWESOME dude.
 Who's gonna understand that you are going to be really frustrated occasionally.
Who's gonna make sure you don't worry about anything that has to do with not having a job.

5) Get used to telling people "I am a housewife". It's a lot harder than you realize.

A Good Habit A Day ..

It seems if you do anything for 21 days continuously, it becomes a habit. I intend to put that to test. Starting today, I am going to start a couple of things and try to keep it up for as long as I can (21 days for sure).

1) Yoga. Signed up for a class today and am going to be doing Surya Namaskars, Joint rotations, Kapal Bhati and what nots. First class down.

2) Write. I have been so busy with crafts that I haven't really written in forever. I know, I know, look at the date of the last entry in this blog.

Ugadi Shubhakaankshalu

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Trisha's side of it

Vc writes for Trisha in response to Jitu

July 11 2007 -7. That’s the count for today. I don’t know if I should be frustrated or amused. Well, the girl was nice-ish, good family and all that blah. But, she just isn’t HER. I think even mom is beginning to tire. She’s going back home tomorrow, finding a Mallu match in Bangalore is harder than I thought. No match seems to work. If we agree, the girl’s side doesn’t.  And only for ones we aren’t too interested in, we get a “Yes”.
It is tiring to put myself out there each day. Each time I step over the threshold into a house, I wonder if the girl of my dreams is about to greet me. The strain is telling on me. I don’t want to wonder if something is wrong in me or if I will be forced to settle for someone lesser than what I want. I think I should stop this search for a while and just let life play itself out. After all, if and when it’s meant to be, it will, right?

Jul 11 2007,
I love dogs! I knew I would be doing something for them when I was 7.  Hi my name is Trsiha , my father Pinarai Vijayan Kutty, took one look at me when I was 10 minutes old and said I was Nobel, hence the name Trish . I always wanted to join the College of Veterinary and Animal Sciences and become a Veterianian Doctor , Thrissur which is stone’s throw away from grandpa’s farm house. It’s been a year since I started my own clinic, here in Bangalore and I love my job.

July 13 2007Mom’s gone home, so it’s back to food at the mess 3 times a day. I already miss her cooking. I wonder why she goes back as soon as she can. I would love for her to stay here with me. Even if dad were still with us, I would find a way for all of us to be here. Probably, that’s the biggest tug she has to go back home.  Maybe I should move back too. There’s nothing to keep me here, just a job. I should be able to find one closer home. It would be fun to go to work from there. Same home, all the memories of dad, all my friends and of course Mom. Sigh. An IT  job in my village. Only in my wildest fantasies.
Well, that’s it for now. Chiggy has a party tomorrow, will have to find a way to wriggle my way out of it. Ever since he’s gotten married, he’s been on my case. How am I to help it if he married the first girl he saw. Listening to his “Abhi tak nahi mili kya be” 10 times a day at office is bad enough, I don’t want to go to his house and have him do it in front of bhabhi.  Maybe I’ll just say I have some extra work to finish and can’t come.

July 13 2007
Savithri Pillai is throwing a party. Her husband Chittaranjan Dasgupta works for a software firm and he is full of life. I am wondering if I should go ? What will Pa say ? His words of wisdom are still echoing in my ears. Sigh!. I’ll tell her I had an important client, haha  a bulldog with a piece of bone stuck to his teeth. 

Damn ! Savithri never gives up ,  so here I am trying to select a suitable attire for the party. Thank God I went shopping last week. I wonder where I kept my bangles.

July 14 2007Thank God I know Chiggy. Thank God he forced me to attend his party.
I saw my angel today, all thanks to him. I walked in wondering how to plan my escape and there she was. She noticed bhabhi looking at the door and turned  to see who it was. As those big eyes looked at me and that strand of hair fell across her face, I was a goner. She had me with that look. She looked away. I kept looking at her and would have all night if Chiggy didn’t elbow me right in the rib cage.”Aise mat dekh be, thoda to sharm kar”. I looked back and she had a small smile on her face, she had heard that. *^@#*%^ Chiggy and his boom box voice.
I didn’t see who else was in the house. No one was visible to me but my angel in blue. Each time she lifted her hand to move that strand of hair off her face, her bangles would make this beautiful sound. Mr. Boombox leaned in and said “Intro chahiye?Teri bhabhi ki dost hai. ” I managed to nod a yes while I was trying to gather my wits. Was I being that transparent, what would she think?
She and bhabhi were getting off the sofa. I panicked. Was she leaving? I couldn’t let her go. I literally ran across the hall and when I reached her, I had no idea what to say or what to do. I just stood there looking at her. She raised her eyebrows, looked at bhabhi and managed a smile. In that eternity, I was frozen to the spot. I could have walked on by. I could have spoken to Bhabhi. I didn’t have to cross the hall. The earth could have opened up and swallowed me. But no. I just stood there. Bhabhi must have figured it out. “This is Jitu”, she introduced me to her. She nodded and said hi. I wanted to smile, I wanted to say hi. But no. I just stood there. “I am Trisha” she said. And gave me her hand. I could have shook her hand. The hand with the bangles. They made their jingling sound when she thrust her hand out. My mind was screaming “You are wondering whether it is a jingling or a tinkling sound. Jackass, shake her hand. She thinks you are a weirdo. Her face is changing . Dude, do something.”  I manage to put out my hand and immediately took them back, they were clammy.  “Dude, do something.” So , I do a namaste. Then she gives me “What kind of a whacko are you” look and smiles again.
She turned to leave and I blurted out “Are you leaving, don’t go”. She burst out laughing. That did it. I had decided.
When I finally decided that I wouldn’t think of marriage, she popped into my life. Perfect timing I must say.
We spent most of the evening together, even though bhabhi kept acting as a chaperone, all the while winking at Chiggy across the room.
I took her number. I think mom will need to come back here again.

July 14 2007

I am the first of the guests to arrive for the Party. I try to help Savithri set up the Garlic Shrimps, I take a bite, yummy. Chittaranjan Bhaiya is fiddling with the new Bose System,I hope they play that new track from Dr Dre “ I need a doctor” I need a doctor, doctor To bring me back to life .  Why is that guy staring at me? Sigh* I think I overheard Chittaranjan Bhaiya talking to that stranger,haha so he thinks I am attractive.Guys!  Savithri comes over and tells me that there are 4 people checking me out. I smile, I should have work something not so eyecatching. J I think I like the attention. It’s getting late I have to be going now, where is my bag. Oh ! wait Bhaiya is introducing me to one of his weird friends. Sigh, lets get on with it, Jitu his parents must be a fan of Jumping Jack Jeetendra ,” 

ek banjaara gaaye jeevan ke geet sunaaye hum sab jeene waalon ko jeene ki raah bataaye ek banjaara gaaye Ho Ho! ..( smile) I put my hand out. Who is this guy, he is so funny ! haha.Let me grab some more of those shrimp entrĂ©e’s. Wow he actually can speak J. This evening is going to be interesting.

I didn’t know anyone could be so interesting. Jeetu works for a software firm along with Chirraranjan Bhaiya and hails from a small town near Kottayyam. He looks like a honest and decent chap. Everytime he talks, I just look into his eyes. Sigh.I think he works out everyday ;) 

Why is Savithri winking at Bhaiya ? Maybe their personal joke. They make a nice couple.I wonder if I will meet Jeetu again. I would like to.

August 3 2007After that first meeting, I got as much info as I could. She is a Mallu(mom was so happy about that). She has a few relatives in Kerala and has lived in Bangalore all her life. She works as a veterinarian. I managed to gather the nerves to call her and have a little bit of conversation I love that all our conversations seem to pick off as if there was no break. I love that she laughs at all my jokes. I love that she talks with so much honesty. Nothing romantic really, but I guess we have all our lives for that. I am sure she knows what I feel. She doesn’t give away much.

August 3 2007
Today I received an interesting call. Jeetu . I wonder how he got Savithri to give my number.He is funny and I don’t think I have every laughed so much. The patients waiting in the next room would have been scandalized thank God they don’t understand Malayalam. :) I think I will meet him over the weekend.

September 6 2007It was really funny when she came out with a tea tray. Her parents think it is an arranged marriage setting. I didn’t let them know that I made sure her uncle found out that I was an available groom and would be a good match for her. It took me a long time to make sure he found me via his friend’s brother’s  son’s office mate who was in my team. Ha ha ha , someday, I will tell her about this.
She knew I was coming of course, my photo and bio data got sent. We didn’t speak about it. When she gave me the tea, she smiled. We were conspirators together in this.

September 6 2007
I am scared. I don’t know what will happen if Pa finds out that I already know Jeetu. I wonder how Uncle Kunjumon got this alliance. When I told Jeetu that my parents were looking for alliances, he smiled and told that he would be the first and last groom she would see. Hah !  I was so surprised and almost dropped the phone when amma told me that Jeetu was coming .

Now I have to go serve him tea, hah, I’ll add a couple of spoons of salt. Serves him right for keeping me in the dark :) 

July 14 2010It’s been 3 years since I first met Trisha. I didn’t know that. Being bad with dates does that for you. She told me today. Mrs. Trisha Jitu.  I couldn’t be more thankful for anything else. That includes of course, our week old little bundle of joy. I think I will call him Chiggy at home. J