Say a little prayer for me.

Today was an important day for someone very close to me. A test of sorts.Something that the person has worked hard for. I pray for you that you pass it and get what you want and worked for.
Good luck D!
P.S. anyone who reads this, please send up a prayer from your end too.Maybe it'll reach the ears of the right One. :)

et tu?

Ever get that feeling "Why am I here again?" I am currently buried under the weight of that emotion.

Pain .. pane... payne... paen ..

Have you ever really given thought to the concept of pain? Not why it is caused or how, but the feeling of pain. I have, in some detail quite recently and I realised a couple of things:-
-> You always live through it. No matter how bad it is, even if you faint since your body cant take it, you always have to get up and pick up the pieces.
-> The memory of pain puts fear into you and also a hope that since you have already borne it, if it ever happens again, you can face it better.That doesnt happen.A memory turns out to be a pale recollection of the actual pain. Always.
-> You never get used to it.It is always there at the back of your mind waiting for you to get out of your safe cocoon, even a little slip.
-> Cribbing does no good, it doesn't lessen the pain, sharing doesn't reduce it for you(nor does it help the poor soul you offloaded on).It is your part of suffering, you have to carry it not matter how many helpful/sympathetic shoulders you find along the way.
-> It teaches you some lessons to remember.It steels you against making the same mistakes again.It fills you with a fear that it dares you to conquer.And it always is that one fear that you overcome makes it easier to overcome others.It shows you a glimpse of life outside your safe haven, life isn't a bed of roses, never was- you appreciate what normalcy more.
Whew, that was a morbid, morose what not piece of writing.
what brought about that was having Hydrogen Peroxide(I think) put on your 10 inch long skin wound and seeing froth build up on that while you feel like the thing is going to burn its way right into you!
This is my 3rd dressing for the wound, the first one on the night of the great fall, and I had thought betadene(I think) burns like mad.Dressing 2 saw the nurse pull out the first dressing that the new skin was trying to grow over and hence reopening the wound(and to think doctors would know this in advance!!!)Dressing 3 with the peroxide stuff that hurt so bad I had tears streaming down my face.Dressing 4 was the least painful of all. And now finally I can stop using a bandana/scarf/shawl/long sleeved outfits/dupattas to cover my war wounds, it still freaks out some people when they see my hand reaching for the 2nd floor button in the lift , they look at my face with a weird look of half pity and half fright, takes me a second to understand why and by then, I am out the lift!
It'll be as good as old in 2 months, until then, all sport under hold :)

To fly . . or not to fly...

Sunday was supposed to be the hottest day in the last 35 years in Bangalore.I spent the whole day in an open ground frying/baking/boiling and mostly just waiting for my turn at paragliding.
We reached at 10.30am, waited till 6.30 pm when the light was going down.And then realised that we wont be able to do it. And my whole Sunday was wasted.
Got me all grr and I gave a teeny-tiny piece of my mind to one of the organisers , about organising for all the participants and caring for our time.
And I wish I had left it at that.
He came back a few minutes later and said, we can accomodate just one person now, inspite of the fact that there were 4 of us who had paid up and equally wanted to experience the thrill of flying with the birds above.
The process looks simple but is rather complicated. You get into this set of straps which is attached to a 'wing' (the parachute-type thing) and there is another guy - the pilot behind you also strapped in.There is a rope hooked into the strap and the other end goes a km away to a vehicle that winds in the rope.Both the people run for 2-20 steps, the parachute balloons up with the wind and suddenly you are off into the skies, climbing steadily. .After you reach upto 100ft, the rope is removed and then you, you fly with the birds, making lazy turns steering wherever you want
Here are some of the pics.
I got all strapped in, ran a bit and just when I thought I was taking off, I fell, face down, the guy behind on top of me. The vehicle that was pulling the rope did not stop.I was doing a "SuperMan" along the ground for 4-5 seconds. There was a calmness in my mind that I find hard to believe now.It was like being in a void, I could hear nothing, feel very little.I was conscious and awake to what was happening but it did not register.I did not feel pain, I knew my skin was being scraped off, I wondered why I pushed for taking the last ride, I was confident that nothing would be really wrong, I felt bad for my family who were watching this.And then I stopped moving.
Someone tried to pull me up but couldnt since the whole contraption had collapsed on me.I finally got to my feet and was trying to convince all that I am ok.My right hand was a bright red with few remnants of skin hanging on.My knee was ok, luckily no complications there.I was a little dazed, yes, but totally aware.
And luckily that was it.My brother's face was a dark cloud.He could not believe it.My sis was trying to apply some salve to it.Vc's face was unreadable.And I found a reason to smile. This was to be my birthday gift - flying in the air.
So much for wings of wax.
Thats the bad stuff.My birthday of course was wonderful, couple of cakes, couple of temples and I got to spend time with the most important people in my life and I turn another year older, wiser and hey , I have the scars to prove it now !

RULES OF WORK - from a forward, had to put it up !!

1. Never give me work in the morning. Always wait until 4:00 and then bring it to me. The challenge of a deadline is refreshing.
2. If it's really a rush job, run in and interrupt me every 10 minutes to inquire how it's going. That helps. Or even better, hover behind me, advising me at every keystroke.
3. Always leave without telling anyone where you're going. It gives me a chance to be creative when someone asks where you are.
4.. If my arms are full of papers, boxes, books, or supplies, don't open the door for me. I need to learn how to function as a paraplegic and opening doors with no arms is good training in case I should ever be injured and lose all use of my limbs.
5. If you give me more than one job to do, don't tell me which is priority. I am psychic.
6. Do your best to keep me late. I adore this office and really have nowhere to go or anything to do. I have no life beyond work.
7. If a job I do pleases you, keep it a secret. If that gets out, it could mean a promotion.
8. If you don't like my work, tell everyone. I like my name to be popular in conversations. I was born to be whipped.
9. If you have special instructions for a job, don't write them down. In fact, save them until the job is almost done. No use confusing me with useful information.
10. Never introduce me to the people you're with. I have no right to know anything. In the corporate food chain, I am plankton. When you refer to them later, my shrewd deductions will identify them.
11. Be nice to me only when the job I'm doing for you could really change your life and send you straight to managers' hell.
12. Tell me all your little problems. No one else has any and it's nice to know someone is less fortunate. I especially like the story about having to pay so much tax on the bonus check you received for being such a good manager.
13. Wait until my yearly review and THEN tell me what my goals SHOULD have been. Give me a mediocre performance rating with a cost of living increase.. I'm not here for the money anyway.
Tell me you did not nod your head for at least one of those of them !! This totally made my day , starting my day early in the morning laughing out loud totally works for me :)