rOLE rEVERSALS aRE nOT a tHING oF tHE pAST aNYMORE!!

It finally happened.
I was at work, slogging away for no extra perks, no extra money, no comp off, no recognition on a Sunday evening while my husband was out shopping !!!

Its almost indecent, isnt it ???
Hey Vc,
We can go out shopping tomorrow, I can get off work early, unlimited budget isnt it? ;)

Uahahhahahahahahaha .. kahani mein twist!

From here :
...a particular plaque apparently engraved in the early 2nd millennium CE.....she interprets as showing amicable and very friendly terms between local authorities and a Muslim merchant trading from the Persian Gulf. This was a dedication written in Sanskrit which records the deeds of purchase of land and construction of a mosque. I saw that the same volume she quoted from also contained a second translation .... engraved in Arabic. The same translator gives literal translations that explicitly spell out that the merchant praises his own Sultan back at home, and prays that the Sultan’s dominion and his true faith holds sway over these heathen lands in the near future.
Where is the bhai-bhai stuff if one wants to conquer the other?
Where is the peaceful co-existence if one wants to prove that the other is the boss?
Where is the concept of all-religion acceptance if daily something comes up to show that there are differences? Someone not being allowed to wear scarves to a school is an issue. Someone not wanting to wear a helmet over a turban is an issue.Being allowed to put a red dot on the forehead is a victory.
Would there be a problem if people were allowed to live as they wanted, follow customs they chose(whether cultural/religious) as long as it doesn't hurt another soul. Doesn't the problem stem from the fact that one wants to make the other follow some customs that he may or may not want to?

If I go to Saudi, I will probably be required to cover my head and wear ankle length clothes and be dressed conservatively. That's the rule of the state there and if you want to be there, then follow our rules.Whether you consider that backward or oppressive is not our problem.
But when I come to India, anything goes , isn't it? So, don't the religious majority here get to make rules? Well, not really, because we Indians have enough sense to have a democratic, secular government. We allow for freedom of speech, we don't advocate harsh punishments, we let simple court cases drag for decades. Sab kuch chaltha hai yaar attitude rules.
You can do whatever you want and get away with it most of the time. Its like kicking your parents as children, throwing a tantrum or bawling at not getting what you want.They suffer it, with love.
But why should the country show love to one who chooses to abuse the freedom he has been given.
So, basically, India doesn't have the right to enforce rules other than basic humanity ones. Which is fine by me, that's what all governments should achieve to strive for.
India keeps trying to pull up the 'backward classes', most of whom are well to do. While there may be many who actually deserve it, they probably are not even aware that there are reservations for them.
India lets terrorists attack it time and again, gets hurt, stands up on the shoulders of the brave citizens who need to go to work again right through the bomb ravaged areas and the brave soldiers who brave it all to daily fight a war that gets no recognition.
The elected Indian government cannot take a decision without it being put to a Trust vote.
The right to criticize has given us so much power that we talk like authorities on issues we have bare minimum knowledge about. Perhaps like I am doing right now.
I always believed that we were a great culture, that this country will be a super power within my lifetime. But now that illusion has begun to fade away.As long as India cannot stand on her feet and fend for herself within and without, I see no hope.
but then again, "Picture abhi baki hai mere bhai.... "

Go Figure !!

I have one heck of a terrrrrrible headache since 2pm (its almost 6pm now) and the only reason I am still at my desk and working is because I don't want to go tell my boss that I can't do this anymore.
Grrrrrr .

Its always the small things in life...

I was walking back home today morning and saw this guy on a cycle selling flowers on a basket. And pretty flowers they were, Gundu malli wasn't there but there was sannajaji and this greenish-mallipoovu that I have been seeing a lot of nowadays.
Without thinking I went up to him and asked him to give me one moora and he measured out one long hand and wrapped it up for me.
Me: Yenta? (How much?)
Him : 5

And then it hit me, I was out for a morning walk, I wasn't carrying any money on me!!! I am so used to having a bag on me(with a purse :) ) that this was a first for me! I dug into my pockets just in case and found 3Rs.

Me: 5 illa, parvagilla bidi.(I don't have 5, its ok, let it be)
and started to walk away but he called out and said "Yeshtide?" (How much do you have?)
And he actually gave me the flowers for 3Rs saying "Bandbittu duddilla antha hogbedi, Devarigalva" (Dont go away just because you don't have the money, its for God isn't it?) and gave me a big smile!
And of course followed it up with "Rate jasti irovaga hegidru kodalla" (when its costly season I can't give it anyways)
and one more smile.
Now there was a smile that could last me all day :)
Oh , it wasn't the fact that he gave me the flowers for a lesser rate, it was his happy face and small talk with that smile that made it special !

August - Poojas, festivals and suttafying

I don't recall having a single weekend to laze. And since working days rule out lazing(officially at least ;)) , I have been doing things 19 to the dozen all of August. Every single day.
And so, I solemnly swear to kick off my shoes, sink into that couch and not do anything at all for ALL of September !
First weekend :
Skandagiri trek . For details of that place check this and this.
P.S. I love that Payaniga dude ! I so want to have my own travel blog after having read his (which would imply I need to travel a lot ! yipppppeeeeee )
P.S. to the PS : I don't have a write up on that, so borrowing from Payaniga.

That was a Saturday well spent, with office mates and their families. I collected at least 10 sets of curses and abuses for having chosen a trek for an outing instead of "Fun World". I am not going to be allowed to make any further decisions on "where to go's"
Sigh.

The Sunday, when everyone else had taken Crocin pain relief and didn't get out of bed, me and hubby dearest went out with my sibling gang to catch Christian Bale jump around in a Bat suit. LOVED Joker ! May his soul rest in peace.


Second weekend :
The newly weds had a homam to perform at the temple. Some sort of a shanthi pooja, I got to wear a new saree and all that, so ,that was a weekend well spent ! (that's my official line and I'm sticking to it!)

Third weekend :
Luckily this was a long weekend with Friday being Independence day. But I was barely aware of that. That's coz it was Varalakshmi Vratam also on that day. The pujari came home, lots of Poojas and praying to God for stuff :D Neighbour aunties all paying attendance and giving them some stuff each while they wished me marital bliss. All that was ok, but darn, all these pujas need for me to take Ashirvadam from Vc. Touching his feet and all hmph! and his holy majesty gives a broad smile , I give a "I'll kill you" look to the Poojari and he smiles back with a "I cant help it" expression. Indian rituals have it all wrong !! grrrr. Oh and I got a new saree again.
After the 'stress and strain' of all that , Sat-Sun should have been a vacation off, right ! and so it was. We were off to Sakleshpur. And here is Vc's description of it .
We loved it ! It is one amazing place. I mean we got to live in a coffee estate, wake up to the sounds of nature, red-oxide floor with kerosene lamps for light, constant drizzle! Haiiiiiiiiiiiii ... What more can one ask for !!


Fourth weekend :
This was the Krishna Janmashtmi weekend. Saturday midnight pooja at the same time as the one done in Udupi.I have never done this before but Vc does so year after year. And thus, new habits get added into one's life :)

Fifth weekend :
We had our first guests over officially on Sunday, so Saturday got spent in turning the pigsty into a home ! Most of the credit goes to Vc. Sunday morning was spent in cooking. All was spic and span and food ready, the hosts looking human again(as opposed to looking like escapees from an health instituition who toppled into soot and garbage and all else). We got a call from our guests that they would be late by 1.5 hours! I was never that glad in a long time !! Both of us took a moment to catch our breath. Sat down, looked around and felt so proud of what we had achieved, I think Vc turned all senti ;)
It was a evening well spent, catching up with friends always is isn't it?
And after that, we went out go-karting! Now that was FUN! You do end up with a head that has been shaken and stirred and beaten under the helmet. But it was worth it !

And right after that we had Ganesh Chathurthi. My favourite festival of the lot. Got up early (at least earlier that usual :-P) and went out with our shopping basket. The market was a riot of colors, flowers, banana-leaves, sugarcane, Ganesha idols, fruits ! I felt like a kid again, when I used to go out with my dad to get the prettiest Ganesha there was. Pick out the right flowers, pull grass from the neighbour's garden, mango leaves from the neighbouring farm, arrange the dahlias and set the fruits, get the text book of the toughest subject that year, pray to God wholeheartedly.
We never do grow old do we?
And just like that another month passed me by....

Ask a simple question

We went out on a birthday treat recently. The birthday girl had turned 30 that day. Generally the silent type with a smile always on her face. We tried to get her to talk a bit that day.
Somewhere in the middle of that I asked her "What sums up your life so far? What are your achievements? What, when you look back makes you proud?"
Before the sentence was complete she said "Nothing"
and that stunned me into silence.
I did not know what to say next.
Now, here's a woman who's an IT Professional with a Master's degree. She succesfully manages home and work and has an adorable daughter who's just started school. That in itself is an achievement isnt it?
We spoke more that day and we got to learn about stuff that made her happy and stuff that she was good at and all that but I barely remember any of that.
If someone asked me the same, I would probably answer it with an awkward joke, saying perhaps "Bangalore is still standing" or "Who has the time to achieve anything with deadlines like those in our project?"
But truth of the matter is there arent too many things I am proud of.
Oh, dont get me wrong, I take pride in being where I am today.I am content with life.
I know that if I push myself harder I will go where I want to reach faster(I will eventually even if I dont and that is my cushion ;))
I am who I am. I know it took my parents support and standing in society to get me to a point but at some point my individuality does seep in.

So, why dont I feel like I have achieved anything.
Because I have never worked hard for anything in life. Ever.
I have a wonderful family(husband included ;))
My health has been fair enough to me.
I have never wanted for money.
I studied because everybody does.
I took up a professional course since I never really wondered where my true 'skills/interest' lie.
I got into the 'working' chapter of life in the 2nd interview.
I have great friends.
I love life and never need to search for a reason to be happy.

So, why dont I feel like I have achieved anything.
Do I feel an achievement is something that happens in rarity? I mean, that above description fits at least 40 girls I know.(yeah, I know 40 girls !! )
Maybe.

So, why dont I feel like I have achieved anything.
Maybe it because I know I am capable of more but I stay satisfied with now and this.

Ask a simple question. Sigh.
Hey R, Happy birthday !

ICE Capades

I have no idea what the title means, escapades with my car just doesn't sound right..
I have come a long way from to keeping the car outside daily and waiting for my dad to come back from work to park it into the garage :D
I remember when I started saving up to buy a car. I wanted to get a nice mid segment car.Wanted to give a down payment of 1lac and take the rest as a loan. I did a little bit of research on the net.Went to a couple of showrooms with a wise friend (who claims to have driven a car since he was 8) and finalised on the Wagon R.
I can still recall all the times I would go to CoffeDay and force myself to get the cheapest item on the menu (no, Extra whipped cream cant be bought unless you have something with whipped cream already on it !!) I knew that every 10Rs made a difference.Took me 6 months(and it was worth it!) and a loan to have the money ready.
All of us went down to the car showroom to choose the color and all the extra fittings.
"Do you want to get a coating on the base of the car?"
"Power Windows will cost an extra 6000Rs"
"This is the best shade for a tinted window"
"Would you prefer the silver-silver, the golden-silver or the pearl-silver?"
Oh and I had just started going to Driving school. An hour from work daily in a yellow coloured Alto(which was what I first wanted, no !! not the yellow color, just the Alto). I can confidently say I dented the instructor's patience.He just couldn't understand why it was so hard to follow instructions!
My DL test was some fun. There was a long line of tense souls posing next to their cars. By the time I got to my turn, the fear, nervousness, knotted tension had all vaporised for I knew I was definitely going to fail it. The instructor sat at the back of the car (God knows why) and I got to handle the wheels for the first time. The policeman comes up to me and says, "Reverse in a straight line and come back"
That's it?? Me thinks, that's it??? I mean my instructor tore his hair out trying to teach me when to honk, (a light tap, not to long otherwise people wont care, a light tap sounds more confident) , how to reverse into a side road from the left and from the right, what hand signals to show ...
This cant be that bad at all then, I start the vehicle full confidence and reverse the car (of course forgetting to look behind, thankfully the stretch had been emptied for tests but of course no one doubts that you would miss a basic detail like checking at the rear end of the vehicle before reversing) I look up at the policeman, he's busy talking to another dude.
I reach the end point, I think I wouldn't have stopped if the instructor hadn't said "Now stop and go back forward" and literally had me jump out of my skin. You see I had forgotten he was there.
I brake. Press the clutch pedal down. Change the gear to 1st. Release the brake while releasing the clutch and the car jerked to a halt.
There I had it. I failed. The instructor said, "Move it, start it again" all the while looking at the cop who was busy still. I started and went and stopped properly this time.
And I Passed!
I know I know. I shouldn't have.
Well, I did and I got my brand new shiny car home, and for the life of me, I cant remember which shade of silver it is.
Went on a few long drives with my dad sitting in the passenger seat and guiding. I was so not good at it, esp when I had sole control. I wouldn't consider driving alone ever.I would just get too nervous. Day 2 that car was home, we were in a hurry to get somewhere. Dad got into the car asking me to move along since I was blocking traffic and at that moment some bright spark parked a 2 wheeler bang in front of my car, so much for the BIGGGG L board sign. A couple of people who had nuclear deals to sign started honking like the world was ending. I tried manoeuvring the car out and successfully made it without hitting the 2 wheeler. It got me so excited that I believe I forgot to straighten the wheels onto the road. I cut across from the left end of the road right onto the right end which had a gutter with a cycle in it leaning against a wall.
I remember dad saying "Brake Brake" . The last thing was him pulling the handbrake. My shiny brand new car went into the gutter and made multiple crunching noises and came to a dead halt.
I got out with my legs trembling/shivering (not sure what that's called). I couldn't believe it . I was horrified. I couldn't walk. People started to gather and all the nuclear deal guys just moved ahead with a shake of the head just happy to make it on time inspite of a bad driver wasting their time.
I was in tears by the time I got back home. Everyone was glad it was close home and no real damage was done. So was I, until an aunt said "Thank God, no one was sitting in the gutter" Can you even imagine what I felt then.
I swore off the car. It took the same friend again to teach me all over again and help me gain some confidence. The best and toughest part was trying to get the car moving when on an upward slope. And he did stop before he could teach me to parallel park ;)
Probably coz I left for the US. I did drive a car there. Auto gear and all that. I believe that gave me more confidence.
And once I got back, it took some goading from my brother to get me to drive again. One fine day, I was so pissed off, I just took the car out the park and right to office.
I just cannot get the car to move after it comes to a standstill.Even so, I was on my way to a real tricky crowded area. Looking back all I can think is , I must have been really pissed off.
I avoided stops as far as I could. Until I got into bumper to bumper traffic, where 1st gear is all you need and all I couldn't use. The car stopped. I was on the verge of telling myself that I was too hasty in doing this when I was not ready, when a auto guy stuck behind my car came forward, looked into my window and said
"Odsak baralla, sumne barthare road mele" (They dont even know how to drive and they come out on to the road)
And suddenly, I was relieved, that's the worst that can happen.
Took me quite some time to actually drive a car with some semblance of confidence but I do now.
The day I did the 3hour continuous stretch to a picnic spot through a highway and in city traffic, I had arrived.

and then ....

Everything remains the same and nothing remains the same at all !
Everything has changed and nothing has changed at all !
I am me, still. I think.
I am different, now I think.
The small things have changed and the big things are exactly as I would have wanted them. I can sense a difference but the essence is there strong as ever. I know not where each step leads, I know not if I will remain me, I know not how long he'll eat burnt food without revolting .... ;)
Well, I am happy and that I know :)
Mrs.Vc

Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue

I stepped outside my home yesterday, as usual fiddling with my mobile, not looking where I was going and .... no , I dint fall, thanks for thinking the nicest thought that comes into your head.... I see this couple passing by, I absent mindedly turn back to my mobile and see that the lady has stopped and turned around and was gesturing to me. She says "Chennagidiya" and I go "hmm, smile ,neenu(darn I should have said neevu)?
she nods and then I realise who she is.
Now, the area I live in, at one point of time, fully belonged to just one man. A landlord / zamindar if you will. He passed away and split it up among 5 sons, all of whom have their houses on the street that I have my house on. The village turned into part of Bangalore, land got sold to all those new settlees and people like yours truly began to call that area theirs.
Now, the family of those 5 brothers still continue to have farms and have cows , so there's a whole lot of village atmosphere yet when you go to their homes. The menfolk sell milk in the morning, the women will help clean up the gobar, they have a dozen or so servants running around.
Now the children of this household grow up in an atmosphere of zamindari whilst having to do proper physical labour without shying away from it and yet go to colleges like Jyoti Nivas or Christ and see the 'other' crowd.
Now when I used to go to college, this lady (go back to the beginning of the story, in case you forgot who the lady is) and me used to occasionally go together. She was the typical homely traditional type, who nurtured hopes or should I call them dreams of graduating and becoming a working woman, independant. She was one of those soft spoken girls who had an ever ready smile no matter what.I lost touch with her and heard a little while later that she had given up studying for marriage. The only thing that came to mind then was fury.Now, here was someone who felt studying would make a difference in her life, someone to whom it mattered that she was educated, someone who had a dream.It was all squashed for a mere marriage. And as a bystander there was nothing else I could do anyways.
She got married and left for some faraway place.
And yesterday, for RamaNavami she had come home to visit her parents and passed by my place. We got to speaking, where are you now ... Are you working? She says , I think wistfully, "I am a proper housewife" and smiles.
Truth be told, she looked so beautiful and at peace with life that it didnt seemt to matter that she wasnt working or that she even remembered what she wanted 8 years ago.
ANd best of all, she still had that smile on :)

Of hillocks,cute village boys and jackfruits

I had gone to this pretty little temple recently. A mere 70 km from Bangalore, somewhere near Tumkur in/on DevarayanaDurga. The drive was scenic in itself and I had no idea that we had road toll near Bangalore, 11Rs to use the road aint that bad. And God bless Reliance for coming up with A1 and saving us the torture of using the roadside dhabas and dont even get me started on the restroom facilities.
Anyways, road tax given, cruising along at 100 kmph (nope windows not rolled down, was way too hot to do that) , it took us a while to realise that the radio was hissing not coz the poor instrument was spoilt but coz we had left Bangalore city limits. We did have mummy giving background music, everytime daddy went right over a hump at 100 :))
Villages, hillocks, lakes, greenery .... thats the way the world was meant to be wasnt it? what is it with metal and glass skyscrapers? Are there no more Howard Roarks left in this world?
We reach the temple right around noon before realising that temples arent open 24/7 , spoilt city people us being. but, to our relief it was open until 1. We had to climb a good 500 stairs , the temple's atop a hill in a cave and there's only so far that a car can take you. There was a nice breeze blowing, helping the puffing panting souls along to the top.
It was a temple as a temple should be. Stone pillars, stone floors, scattered crowd, sweet smell of camphor, incantations of Om in the background, calm breeze, a pretty sight around, a lake behind it and a smiling pujari. What more can one ask for? and of course, the alankaram for the deity (Shri Lakshmi Narasimha Swamy) was beautiful. To complete the pradakshanams , we had to walk around the 'enclosure', turns out we are standing on pure hill-rock and that had been cut away to make place for people to go around. We could see the road winding waywardly (I just liked the sound of that ,so its there... shh) and the green and before there was enough time to sigh we had burning feet to contend with , so we had to run back into the shade.
The prasadam there was by far the best I have ever eaten :D My mouth's actually watering right now at the thought of it.. the generous helping of ghee, the delicious food........ haiiiiiiiii
Darshan done, we drove back down to another temple of the same deity. The contrast has to be seen to be believed. This was almost our typical city temple, though there still was some stone work around and not all covered by the monstrosity called polished granite / marble. A pretty temple in itself no doubt but .... let me just say that the 20th century man had influenced it.
and the next highlight of the day, I drove back the entire stretch. Takes a bow :)